


Green

by Darkwillow6



Category: Supergirl (TV 2015)
Genre: F/F, Jealousy, Old Friends, POV First Person
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-01-23
Updated: 2020-01-30
Packaged: 2021-02-27 13:09:17
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 5
Words: 10,161
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/22377727
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Darkwillow6/pseuds/Darkwillow6
Summary: Alex meets an old friend of Kelly’s.
Relationships: Alex Danvers/Kelly Olsen
Comments: 80
Kudos: 129





	1. Meeting Sarah

**Author's Note:**

> Feedback makes my day. ❤️

Paper bags full of snacks completely dominated the surface of the dining table from end to end. This time, Kelly and I were hosting game night and we’d never done it before so I wanted things to go smoothly. As I stood looking at the spread before me, wondering if I had enough bowls for everything, I heard Kelly’s key in the door.

“Hey babe,” she said, approaching me.

Her eyes left mine, though, as she took in the sight before her. 

“Hey,” I said, kissing her.

“Don’t you think maybe you overdid it a little with the snacks?” she asked, amused.

“You’ve seen my sister eat. You tell me,” I said.

“Fair point,” she conceded with a chuckle.

She reached out and held the side of one bag open with a single fingertip, peeking inside. Her expression was an appreciative one as she perused my selections. Salty, sweet, spicy and savory were all present in varying degrees. 

“They should be here at seven so we have plenty of time to get set up,” I said.

I went into the kitchen and started digging through the cabinets for some bowls. Kelly followed and leaned against the counter where I was building my pile. Her arms were folded over her chest and her relaxed expression from a moment ago had turned to a pensive one.

“So, I have a friend in town,” she began.

“Oh, yeah? Did you invite her to come tonight?” I asked.

“I wanted to ask if you were okay with it first.”

“Kelly, you can invite whoever you want,” I replied, wondering why she’d think otherwise.

I brought an armful of bowls over to the table, pushing aside some of the snacks to make room. Our games were spread out across the coffee table and since things were mostly set up, I met Kelly back in the kitchen to pour us some wine.

“Is this a friend from school?” I asked, tearing the foil from a new bottle of pinot. 

“From the military, actually. I haven’t seen her in years because she lives in Connecticut, but she’ll be here a week.”

“That’s great. I’m happy you’ll get to spend time with her. What’s her name?”

“Sarah,” she replied.

I finally got the cork out and filled our glasses, halfway. We’d probably have plenty to drink tonight, but we weren’t driving anywhere so why not get a head start. Kelly then took out her phone, presumably to text Sarah, and I was excited to meet someone who knew Kelly before I did.

Kara was the first to arrive, ten minutes before seven. I poured her a glass of wine from the bottle Kelly and I had been sharing. With her free hand, she started sampling from each of the snack bowls. Kelly and I shared a look as she crunched away on a handful of pretzels.

“So what are we playing?” she asked, heading for the couch.

“You pick,” I said.

Nia and Brainy arrived before she could peruse the pile. They were almost immediately followed by Lena. She shared an awkward hug with my sister and I was glad that she was able to start forgiving her. 

“That should be Sarah,” Kelly said a few minutes later when the doorbell sounded again.

I followed close behind as she reached the door and opened it. Sarah was taller than Kelly, but much more muscular. Her hair was light brown and wavy. It was long enough to get caught under Kelly’s forearms when she hugged her tightly around the shoulders.

Sarah’s hands, however, were resting in a too familiar way on Kelly’s waist. She noticed that I noticed, but made no move to rectify it. I didn’t know the extent of her relationship with Kelly so the small exchange either meant a lot or absolutely nothing. I consciously decided not to overreact.

“I’m so happy you could come! Come in,” Kelly said, pulling her excitedly.

They stepped in front of me and Kelly kicked the door shut.

“This is Alex. My girlfriend,” Kelly said.

“Sarah,” the woman said, reaching to shake my hand.

I met her green eyes and could see unabated confidence in them. Her grip on my hand was too assertive. It shook me just a little though I played overly confident for Kelly’s sake. Well, for my pride. But if anyone asks...

“Nice to meet you. Welcome to our apartment,” I said.

It was petty and unnecessary, but I wasn’t above it. Not when I could see something so clearly that Kelly either didn’t or decided not to mention for some reason. So, of course I was going to drive the point home that Kelly and I were serious. So much for not overreacting.

“Thanks for having me,” she replied, unperturbed.

Then, Kelly walked around the living room with her, introducing her to everyone. I went to top off my wine because the night was suddenly moving slower. I hoped I was wrong about Sarah because I was so happy that Kelly had someone from her past that she was still close to besides her brother.

“Did you pick something?” I asked Kara when I got back to the living room.

“Pictionary?” she asked, holding up the box.

“Sounds good,” I replied, still distracted by the other woman’s presence.

I looked over and she was laughing with Kelly, one hand on my girlfriend’s shoulder. I turned back to Kara, forcing away the thoughts that, more and more, seemed to be blown out of proportion. I took the rest of the games off of the table and moved them to the kitchen counter so we could set up.

“That’s so awesome that Kelly’s friend came. How long is she in town for?” Kara asked.

“A week,” I said, hopefully not the way it sounded in my head.

“Who are the teams?” Brainy asked, thankfully interrupting more Sarah related questions.

“Me, Alex, and Sarah versus you four,” Kelly said suddenly.

“No couples. That’s like the first rule,” Nia protested.

“Fine. Alex and Nia switch,” she amended.

I forced my competitive nature to remain in check because the last thing I needed right now was to make an ass of myself. Besides, for all I knew, Sarah was straight and I’d been working myself up over nothing. Once everyone had their snacks and drinks, we started the game.

Kelly drew a particularly good turtle, which Nia, ever the animal lover, guessed in no time. They shared a three-way high five after and cheered, hoping to intimidate us. As the rounds went on, though, we held our own. My disappointment after losing by one point was compounded when Sarah picked Kelly up, twirling her once in a show of victory.

I learned two things tonight, after those ten rounds. Sarah was terrible at drawing and she and Kelly had some sort of mind-meld situation going because she somehow accurately translated all of the shapeless squiggles. They wandered off to the porch after that and I kept myself busy cleaning up.

“Why are you so tense? This isn’t the first time you’ve lost Pictionary,” Kara joked.

“I’m not tense,” I said, suddenly becoming aware of the tightness is my shoulders.

“Want another drink?” she asked.

“No,” I replied, wanting to keep a clear head.

Sobering up would hopefully keep me from voicing my probably irrational fears to Kelly. What did it matter anyway? Even if Sarah was pursuing Kelly, what would it amount to? She’d be gone in a few days and all she’d have would be phone calls. 

After an hour of their absence, my anxiousness waxed. Everyone else had gone home. I put all of the snacks into baggies, put away all of the games, and washed dishes in the time that they’d been out there. I went to the bathroom and when I came out, they were near the front door, saying goodbye.

“It was so nice to see you. I’m looking forward to tomorrow,” Kelly said.

What was tomorrow?

“Thank you, both. I had a great time. Good night,” she said.

When Kelly closed the door, the room was silent and it was late. I hoped she’d bring up her plans so I wouldn’t have to. What did they talk about out there? I could see, now, that Kelly was pretty drunk. They must have taken a bottle of wine outside with them.

“Ready for bed?” I asked her.

“Definitely,” she said, exhaustion hitting her.

I changed quickly, uninhibited by alcohol, and collapsed onto the bed while Kelly struggled with her shirt.

“You want some help?” I asked, my mood picking up at the sight.

“Nope. Got it,” she said, finally tossing it in the direction of the hamper. 

Her pants were next. Then, she took off her bra and threw on a large tee shirt to sleep in. Not bothering with pajama bottoms, she turned off the light and got into bed next to me. She turned to set her alarm which reminded me of her mystery agenda.

“So, you guys have plans tomorrow?” I said, when she rested her arm heavily over my chest.

“Yeah. She won’t be here long so we thought we should make the most of it,” she replied, moving her hand from my shoulder to my stomach.

“Well, we can always go for a visit to her place sometime. Meet her friends and significant other,” I said, awaiting the information I wanted to know most.

“She’s not seeing anybody right now. She doesn’t really do the relationship thing,” Kelly replied.

That, oddly, didn’t put me at ease. I was about to dive into my internal spiral when Kelly sat up and looked down at me.

“What’s wrong?” I asked.

She didn’t respond, but moved to straddle me suddenly and her hands were planted on either side of my head.

“I’m sorry I was M.I.A. most of the night,” she said, speaking quietly since she was so close.

“You don’t have to apologize. She’s your friend. You haven’t seen her in forever.”

She leaned down the rest of the way to kiss me when I stopped speaking and I was very aware of the fact that her bottom half was only covered by a thin pair of underwear. I wondered where this was going because she was tired a few minutes ago, but the rocking of her hips wasn’t subtle.

When her lips left mine, they landed again on my neck, then my collar bone and rational thought was fleeting. But I was still in my head. Why was she so aroused? Was this really about me or did her hour outside with Sarah have more to do with it? The single, possible lesbian, was making this impossible.

I put my hands on her waist to hold her steady because if she kept doing that, I’d change my mind. When I finally stilled her gyrations, she looked down at me again, eyes more pupil now.

“What’s wrong?” she asked.

“Just... you’ve had a lot to drink. I don’t think we should. And you should rest,” I replied, because that was also true.

She looked like she was about to say something, but instead she tucked her hair behind her ear and dismounted. 

“Are you mad?” I asked.

“No. Of course not,” she replied, lying back down beside me.

“I love you,” I said, feeling like she wasn’t completely unbothered by my reticence.

“I love you, too. Good night,” she said, kissing me on the lips unexpectedly.

Now I could finally overthink everything in peace.


	2. Complications

While I was getting ready for work the next morning, I heard Kelly desperately working at the cap of the Advil. I got her a bottle of water from the kitchen and she’d finally gotten the pills open by the time I’d reached her with it. She smiled in thanks and drank half the bottle without pausing. I sat down on the bed to tie my shoes and fought myself internally regarding whether or not I should ask what her plans were. But if I asked, she might think I didn’t trust her.

“I should be home around five. Do you think you’ll be back by then?” I asked her as I stood to kiss her goodbye.

“I’m not sure. Last night she mentioned that she hadn’t been fishing since the last time we went together so I’m taking her down to the pier,” she replied.

On the one hand, I was satisfied that she wasn’t being intentionally evasive or keeping secrets so that part of my paranoia began fading fast. On the other hand, she was still going to be with this woman all day long. A woman who ‘doesn’t do the relationship thing’. Her confident demeanor the other night made me wonder if anything had happened between them in the past. But if it had, and Kelly didn’t mention it, then that would be very bad.

“Sounds like fun. I hope you catch something. I’ll see you tonight,” I said, already en route to the door.

“Bye! I love you!” she called after me.

“I love you, too,” I added before I was alone on the other side of the door.

On the drive to work, I tried to calm myself down. I still had no hard evidence that Sarah even wanted Kelly that way. I wished I could talk to Kelly about how I was feeling because she was always the one to calm me down when I was spiraling, but in this case, holding it in was the better option. Four more days. In the grand scheme of things, that was nothing. I could go four days without forcing a wedge between Kelly and Sarah based on what amounted to nothing.

At work, we were mid-crisis when I arrived and I felt guilty for being glad for the distraction. I rushed downtown with Supergirl to get things under control. A group of aliens, each with a different power, was in the middle of robbing a bank. I took cover as Supergirl breached the double doors. Bullets crunched against her, falling ineffectively to the ground as she rushed to round up the hostages. 

Her superspeed created an effective barrier around them, but with all her focus on protecting the hostages, my team had to take down the gang one at a time. We’d managed to get them outside which gave my agents plenty of time to get everyone to safety. I’d handcuffed two of the aliens to a nearby bike rack, but one disappeared only to reappear behind me a second later. 

Before I could turn, something struck me in the back of the head and I was on the ground still conscious but slow to get up. Supergirl, upon seeing what happened, froze my assailant to prevent additional blows. Two DEO agents apprehended him much more effectively, knowing his specific skill. Once I was standing, one of the three remaining threats was rushing toward me. He was tall and purple, limbs stretching to meet me before the rest of his body arrived.

Unable to foresee the attack, his right fist connected with my jaw. Determined not to lose focus this time, I grabbed hold of the retreating arm and was dragged toward him with it. When I was close enough, I returned the favor, much to his surprise. He was stunned long enough to be apprehended and when I turned to assess the remaining threats, I saw that my team had it under control. 

All five were now detained and as my adrenaline began to fade, the pain in my jaw became much more noticeable. I knew a bruise would form if there wasn’t one already. As the black SUVs drove off, Supergirl landed next to me.

“You’re hurt,” she said.

“I’ve had worse.”

“You’re off your game today,” she added, carefully.

“He was like a freakin’ Stretch Armstrong. I couldn’t have known that,” I said.

“You don’t need to get defensive. I’ve just seen you get out of way crazier things without a scratch. You seem distracted. If you need some time off-”

“I don’t. Look, I am distracted. Kelly is spending the day with Sarah and I know they’re just friends, but I don’t know anything about her,” I said.

The only reason I said anything at all was because I wanted, or more likely needed, Kara to tell me that I was being ridiculous so I could relax.

“You trust Kelly,” she stated.

“Not Sarah,” I replied, letting out a deep exhale.

“They’ve known each other a long time, Alex. They’re probably pretty close. I’m sure that makes it easy to misread things. You should talk to Kelly.”

“I can’t.”

“Why not? You talk to her about everything. You can talk to her about this.”

“Because I’m scared that I might be right,” I said, my stomach feeling like lead.

“Kelly loves you.”

“That doesn’t mean she doesn’t love Sarah,” I countered.

“Alex, I don’t think you have anything to worry about. I think it’s probably natural to feel threatened in this situation, but Kelly would never do anything,” she said with certainty.

“We should get back,” I said, unable to continue talking about this.

I couldn’t, however, stop thinking about it. 

After debriefing, I was able to go home. It was already after seven and I was exhausted. When I parked in the driveway, I saw Kelly’s car. As soon as I got inside and closed the door, she crashed into me, pulling me to her.

“Are you okay?” she asked, taking a step back to assess me.

Over her shoulder, I saw Sarah sitting on the couch. My attention was brought back to Kelly when her fingertips lightly traced the bruise along my jaw. She looked scared and I wasn’t prepared to feel so many different things.

“I’m fine,” I assured her.

“I’ve been calling you for two hours,” she said.

“There was a robbery, a fight, then a debriefing. My phone’s been off. I’m sorry I worried you.”

We walked into the living room and I gingerly sunk to the armchair that was perpendicular to the couch where Kelly joined Sarah.

“Oh my god. What happened to your face?” Sarah asked, now that I was lit by the table lamp.

“Just a scratch. I don’t go down easy,” I said, just a notch below aggressively.

I tried to fight my own tone, but my headache was making me irritable on top of the fact that I wasn’t expecting company. Especially, her. This time, though, she struck back just as subtly.

“Glad you’re okay, Director. I’d better head out. Don’t worry. I took good care of Kelly for you,” she said as she walked past me to the door.

That was the exact moment suspicion became reality. The worst part about it was that I had to fight the angry fire she’d lit in me because Kelly wouldn’t see it for what it was and I wasn’t going to give Sarah the satisfaction of pushing Kelly away. When she was gone, I locked the door behind her and held back a frustrated growl.

“I’m going to get in the shower,” I said to Kelly.

I knew that the longer I was around her, the more difficult it would be to keep things to myself. Besides, I really needed a shower. There was still a light dusting of gravel in my hair and I could feel the gritty texture of dirt on my skin when I rubbed my neck. Kelly didn’t respond, mostly because I was halfway to the bathroom before she had a chance.

I stood under the stream for a long time, just letting everything fall away. What the fuck did she mean? Was she saying it just to get to me or did something really happen? I wanted to punch something despite the soreness in my hands from, well, punching things. What was her end game? Did she just want to break us up for fun and go home? That didn’t track. She cared about Kelly.

Was she trying to get Kelly to break up with me? Maybe she didn’t get into relationships because she’d been waiting for Kelly. And it was arrogant of her to think that she could undo what Kelly and I had in a week. But she was almost right. If I didn’t get my own emotion under control, I’d practically be begging her to leave me for Sarah.

When I finally got out of the shower, Kelly was on the couch with the TV on while she scrolled through Facebook on her phone. I threw on my pajamas before walking in to sit next to her. She set her phone down on the coffee table and put her hand on my bare knee. I rested mine on the back of the couch, around her shoulders.

“Feel better?” she asked, snuggling into me.

“Much. Tell me about your fishing trip,” I said.

“Not much to tell. I didn’t catch anything, but Sarah caught a big one. We came back here and cooked it.”

“That explains the smell,” I teased.

“Your leftovers are in the fridge,” she replied, swatting at me for my comment.

My stomach growled at the mention of food and Kelly laughed at its insistence, offering to heat it up for me. I nodded and she went about her task. As it heated, I took notice of the distinct scent of brussels sprouts. She returned a moment later with it and I pulled the fish apart with my fork while it cooled a little.

“Thank you,” I said.

I took a bite and it was delicious. Damn it. I could barely make hamburger helper without burning the apartment down and here I was eating restaurant quality whatever fish this was made by the great Sarah. I completely emptied my plate anyway because I was starving after my ass-kicking earlier.

“So, tell me more about you and Sarah. What’s she like?” I asked, setting my plate down.

“Well, we met during basic training. Her last name is next to mine alphabetically so we got paired together a lot,” she started.

“What’s her last name?” I asked.

I tried to make it sound like normal curiosity, but Kelly knew me better.

“Why? Are you going to run a background check on her?” she asked, laughing.

Actually, that wasn’t a bad idea. Although, it was unlikely that I would find anything there that would explain her motives for trying to seduce Kelly away from me.

“Of course not,” I replied, laughing it off.

“Anyway, we got really close and when things got serious with my fiancée, she was the only one that knew. She was the only one I could talk to. In fact, it’s been nice these past couple of days being able to talk about her,” she said.

“You know, you can talk to me about her whenever you want. You don’t have to hold anything back,” I said, heartbroken that she felt she had to in the first place.

“I know. It’s just that she knew her. She can share those memories with me. I’m sorry if that makes you feel left out,” she said.

“Of course, it doesn’t. I understand that you need someone.”

Again, I was feeling guilty. Sarah was someone who could give her what I couldn’t and while that made me feel helpless, I understood it. That’s what these two days had been. A way for Kelly to let everything out that she couldn’t with me. Kelly’s intentions were clear now. Sarah’s were, too. Somehow that made everything even more frustrating because I had to be Team Sarah out loud.

The next day, Kelly invited me to join them for lunch and I did my best to act nonchalant when I agreed. When we showed up, I smirked a little at the flicker of a frown on her face. I guess Kelly hadn’t mentioned that I’d be joining them. We sat down across from her and I rested my arm on the back of Kelly’s chair in a possessive move I wasn’t wholly proud of.

“Sorry for keeping your girlfriend so busy,” she said, once the greetings were out of the way.

“Hey, don’t worry about it. She should spend as much time with you as possible before you head back home, right?” I asked, pointedly.

“Actually, it’s funny…” she began.

“What’s funny?” I asked, certain it wouldn’t be funny.

“I really like it here in National City. I mean, you have a superhero. How cool is that? And the fishing pier is amazing. It’s nice and secluded. Intimate,” she pushed.

I really was five seconds away from giving into my baser instincts and jumping across the table to beat the shit out of her for even the slightest suggestion when our waiter arrived for our drink orders. When he was gone, I was practically vibrating with anger.

“Be right back. Just going to wash my hands,” I said, rushing away.


	3. Partial Truth

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Good news and bad news. The bad news is I haven’t gotten to the fight scene yet. I really want to take my time doing that right. The good news is, this update moves the story along a bit and has a sex scene that I hope will make up for the delay. Thanks for staying with me! ✌🏼

I closed myself into a stall and focused on reducing my heart rate. My breathing slowed little by little, but I knew I couldn’t last much longer than this. She was so far out of line and she didn’t show signs of letting up. When I was calmer, I returned to the table where Kelly and Sarah were mid-conversation.

“So, where were you thinking of applying?” Kelly asked.

“Well, I was hoping the Director would be able to get me an interview at the DEO,” she said, turning to me.

“That’s a great idea! You’re always saying how you wished you got more applicants with military experience,” Kelly said, excitedly.

Fine. If this was how she wanted things to go...

“I can get you an interview, but you should know, there’s a combat exam,” I said.

“I’m more than capable,” she replied.

“Cocky,” I commented.

“I decided it’s not cocky if you can back it up.”

Our food arrived as I tried to check my death stare. Kelly must have ordered for me while I was in the bathroom. 

“I administer all combat exams,” I said when the waiter left.

“Even with your face bruised up like that?” she jabbed.

“I’ll be fine. You won’t be landing any hits,” I replied, forcing a playful tone.

She smirked and I couldn’t wait to wipe it off her face.

“Tomorrow?” she asked.

“7am,” I confirmed. 

Now I had to kick her ass on principle. I was taking her intention to move here as the threat I knew it was. The worst thing about it, though, was that now I had to eventually figure out how to talk to Kelly about what I was feeling. She’d be spending a lot more time with her if she moved here and I couldn’t live in this constant state of fear that she’d leave me. 

The instigation continued as she spent the rest of the meal talking to Kelly about memories they shared, trying to prove that she knew Kelly better. When we were saying our goodbyes, I couldn’t have been happier to get out of there. I wondered how someone as wonderful as Kelly could be friends with someone like this. 

“I’m so happy she’s moving here,” Kelly said on the ride home.

“I’m happy that you’re happy,” I said, trying to be supportive.

I loosened my grip on the steering wheel when I heard it squeak under the force. Part of me wanted to spend half the night in the gym pounding the heavy bag, but I knew there was a risk of wearing myself out and I absolutely could not have Sarah working at the DEO. I was already actively thinking about her much more than I cared to. Kelly’s hand on my upper thigh brought me back and suddenly I had a better idea of how to work off this excess energy.

I parked and followed her to the door. I leaned around her to unlock it and pushed it open so she could walk inside. The thought of making the rest of today about Kelly softened my anger so I went with it. Once her jacket was off, she fell back into the couch cushions, a relaxed expression taking over.

“So, the rest of your day is clear?” I asked, allowing the playfulness in my tone.

“Yes,” she replied with an acknowledging smirk.

A second later, I was kneeling between her legs. When she leaned forward, I pulled off her shirt and threw it aside. She grabbed my face with both hands and kissed me roughly. The frustration from having refused her the other night was to blame for the needy way my body responded now. After a brief detour at her hips to move her closer to the edge of the seat, my hands met back behind her to remove her bra.

The catch in her breath sent goosebumps over my entire body starting at my neck. I kissed her collarbone, but couldn’t resist biting her gently. Not enough to leave a mark, though she’d let me if I wanted to. I knew I was letting my pride run this show, but I was okay with that. My tongue lingered on her right nipple while I worked to quickly unbutton her jeans. 

She leaned back and picked up her hips so I could get the pants the rest of the way off and the quickness of her breath was my metronome. Kelly was usually more of an ‘in bed and under the covers’ kind of woman so an afternoon of improv on the couch was a definite rarity and I was just surprised that I’d actually managed to keep this going. I placed a calculated kiss on her inner left hip because that would tilt the odds in my favor.

I moved her underwear down her hips slowly, because the reward of hearing her ask me for it was something I needed right now.

“Please,” she said, the word barely more than an errant puff of air.

Moving gently, but definitely quickly, I did what the single syllable had asked. As soon as they were off, I was no longer able to slow myself down. I’d never felt such a demanding need to make her come, and she wasn’t making the idea any less appealing as her hips pushed forward again. I was letting the taste of her consume me to the point that I had to consciously remind myself to stay on task.

For the most part, her hands just grabbed for any part of the couch she could get a grip on. My ego grew a little more swollen with each moan that floated through the apartment. She was entirely unconcerned with anyone hearing how much she was enjoying herself and I was an unquenchable audience. It was much too soon when I felt her nails dig into my shoulder and the soft rush of warmth against my chin.

Fortunately, though, we had the whole rest of the afternoon to ourselves. Tomorrow, I would deal with Sarah, but today, I was going to make sure Kelly wasn’t unsatisfied in any way. I moved to sit next to her on the couch and she turned her head toward me, eyelids sinking low. I let myself enjoy the sight of her like this, expression caught between exhaustion and promise.

“What got into you?” she whispered.

I kissed her, hoping it would get me out of answering. Her tired lips accepted the redirection, but the longer we kept kissing, the less fatigued she seemed. She was impatiently pulling at the hem of my shirt a few seconds later and once it was off, she straddled my hips. I knew she likely wanted to return the favor, but I couldn’t let myself be weak right now even though I couldn’t explain that to her. 

Instead, I got up, clutching her naked body to my partially clothed one. I carried her into the bedroom and set her down on the mattress in quite the elaborate show of dominance. When she insisted, my pants came off, but I was much more concerned with being in an advantageous position to touch her. I was, though, very appreciative of the way she felt pressed against me without the fabric in the way.

I kissed her jaw and neck in an effort to slow myself down because I had absolutely no reason to rush. As soon as I felt her wetness on my fingertips, her arms tightened around me, one across my shoulders and the other diagonal from my ribcage to the opposite hip. The hand on my shoulder slipped the few inches required to incite a playful tug of my hair. Every available visual cue told me what she wanted.

At first, I only entered her with one finger, but the amount of wetness present made me more confident in adding another. Her movement was severely restricted by my weight on top of her so even her most insistent thrusting yielded limited results. I adjusted slightly so that her hips could leave the bed, taking me further into her. Her breaths were completely open-mouthed at this point and I swam laps in the rampant satisfaction I felt, hinged entirely on the satisfaction written all over Kelly’s face.

I hung onto every millisecond that I was held, helplessly, inside her. The spasms were almost rhythmic and eventually slowed enough to facilitate the removal of my fingers. Even now, it felt like I had something to prove. She stayed on her back, sucking in air, for several seconds. I knew I was behaving a bit out of character and this was enough for Kelly to see it too but, as far as she knew, it wasn’t hurting anyone so maybe we wouldn’t have to talk about it today.

When she’d caught her breath, I felt her insist, wordlessly, again, that I allow her to provide a scratch for my itch. I held the wrist of her right hand, which was already flush to me. I could feel the layer of slickness between us, betraying me.

“I just want to take care of you today. If you’re okay with that,” I said, feeling myself pooling around her steady fingertips.

“Okay. But right now I feel pretty taken care of. How about we put on a movie or something? We can order dinner later.”

“Sounds perfect,” I said.

She got up slowly and slipped into a loose pair of shorts and one of my tee shirts. It was really playing into the possessiveness I’d been ruled by since Sarah showed up. I followed her out to the living room and she sat down where I’d just fucked her about an hour ago.

I compartmentalized the feelings it caused and turned them into fuel for tomorrow. While she enjoyed the movie, I ran through my repertoire of available hand-to-hand moves. Time that should have been spent enjoying this with Kelly was instead spent worrying about the possibility of losing it.

One way or another, things would change tomorrow and I just had to trust that Kelly and I would be okay.


	4. Pinned

I got to the DEO gym half an hour before Sarah arrived. I’d stretched for half that time and was now leaning against a pile of mats in the corner of the room, waiting. I kept having to unclench my jaw. I’d been waiting to have time alone with her to make everything very clear. When she walked in wearing a black tank top and black leggings, the tension vibrated around us.

“Well, here I am,” she said.

My footsteps echoed until I stopped in front of her, very much in her personal space.

“What’s your plan, huh? What do you want?” I asked.

“A job,” she stated, still just as smug as ever.

“In the same city as Kelly,” I stated.

“Does that worry you?” she asked, taking a few steps away to get into position.

I set my stance a few feet away from her.

“I won’t make things easy for you,” I promised.

“That hasn’t been true so far,” she shrugged.

That seemed like as good a time as any to hit her in the face. Since Sarah was taller than me, I had to rely on my close quarters skill set. I attempted a right jab as soon as I was in range, but she shifted out of the way just in time. I took advantage of the fact that she was off balance and forced my hips forward, leading with my left knee. It connected with her abdomen, just under her rib cage and she was immediately winded.

She recovered quickly and threw a punch aimed at my bruised jaw. I dodged it, barely, and grabbed her wrist. I wrestled her arm straight and swept her leg out from under her before she could reverse my hold. Hearing her back hit the mat was such a satisfying sound that it distracted me for just a second and she clamped both hands around the ankle of my anchoring foot, yanking it forward. The move put me in a very unsteady forward lunge.

As I tried to catch my balance, she moved one of her hands to my inner thigh, forcing me down to my side. She got up and was about to sit on my abdomen, but I was able to stop her with the heel of my foot against her ribcage before she got too close. I thrust her backward and she backpedaled for a second, but didn’t fall. I stood up as quickly as I could.

“She’s happy. You would really ruin that?” I asked.

She lunged at me and the momentum of it had my back against the padded wall of the training room. I grunted at the impact. Her position was perfect for a knee to her gut and I knew that one was going to leave a bruise. For a second, her hands were on her knees. I would have her tapping out soon. 

“You really think you’re better for her than I am? There are things she’ll never talk to you about. Things that she talks with me about for hours. She’s hiding half her life being with you. You’re not better for her. Can’t you see that?”

Admittedly, that absolutely struck a nerve. I took a full force swing at her face, connecting with her cheekbone. My hand radiated with the pain of the collision, but she had been hurt worse. She was on the ground, hand over the freshly tender skin. To her credit, she was up faster than I expected and I could see how much the hit had enraged her. Her stance gave away her next move and when she tried to return the favor, it was easy enough to get her into a choke hold.

I gripped my bicep and used my head to add pressure. A second later, I experienced the long-awaited feeling of her hand tapping out against my forearm. I let her go and she sucked in as much air as she could, coughing on the exhale.

“I feel sorry for Kelly. She confides in you. She lets you in. But she doesn’t even know who you really are.”

“I’m not the bad guy you tell yourself I am. We’re the same. We both want Kelly to be happy. The only difference is that we don’t agree on what that means.”

“We are not the same. If I were in your position, no matter how much I loved her, I wouldn’t tell her. Because if she doesn’t feel the same, then she just lost the one person she can talk to about everything that happened over there. It would change everything. What you’re doing is selfish. And I will do everything I can to protect Kelly from your selfishness,” I said.

“How valiant. But Kelly’s a grown woman and she can protect herself. She doesn’t seem to think she needs protecting, though. Anyway, I better get home and shower. We’re having breakfast together at her office. I’m sure she told you,” she said, getting one last jab in.

I’d won and still lost. I thought this would be enough for her to finally receive the message, but things were about to get worse. I took a shower once she was gone and headed back out to the control room, trying to focus on work. It was nearly impossible. Sarah was en route to an uninterrupted hour with Kelly and I just had to sit back and let it happen.

My mood must have been written all over my face because not one agent came into my office for the rest of the day. I got caught up on the paperwork that I’d been putting off so that I wouldn’t have to talk to anyone. Despite everything, I was glad to be on my way home to see Kelly. When I walked through the front door, Kelly was standing near the end of the bar. I smiled initially, but upon reading her stance, it changed to a confused frown.

“What’s wrong with you?” she asked me, arms crossing over her chest.

“What did I do?” I asked, taking off my jacket and moving closer to her.

“I saw her face, Alex,” she said.

“Yeah. We were sparring. The combat exam. You can’t expect me to go easy on her. The threats we encounter are certainly not going to. She knew what to expect when she-”

“Stop. You went too far and you know it. What I don’t understand is why,” she demanded.

If I told her the truth, catastrophe. If I lied, bigger catastrophe. The desperate urge to avoid it kept me silent. I couldn’t think of one thing to say that was better than saying nothing right now. That didn’t change when she shook her head and walked into the bedroom, picking up the overnight bag she’d already packed.

“I’m going to Sarah’s hotel. If you decide you want me to come back then I suggest you figure out how to explain this to me,” she said, heading to the door.

“Kelly, wait,” I said, knowing this was my only chance to fix this.

She stopped, sighing, and turned around to face me.

“I wish I could tell you, okay? I hate making you feel like this. And you’re right. I went too far. But please, don’t go to her. Please,” I said, the fear completely noticeable.

“Alex, you gave her a black eye. You have to give me more than that,” she said, eyes pleading.

She was disappointed when I clammed up again. This time, she didn’t hesitate before disappearing behind the door. I was weak. If she’d asked again, I don’t think I could’ve kept it from her. But I was not going to be the reason she lost her only living connection to the past no matter what it cost me. It had cost me so much already. Maybe Sarah was going to win no matter what I did, but Kelly deserved more than either of us.

I spent the rest of the night letting myself wallow because this problem seemed unsolvable. I had few glasses of whiskey after her retreat, which was the only reason I was able to sleep that night. As soon as the sunlight poured in the next morning, my migraine set in. I checked my phone, eyes still adjusting, but there was nothing. I sat up in bed, rubbing my face with my palms in frustration.

All I wanted to do was run to Kelly and tell her the truth. Keeping myself occupied at work was the only thing I could do right now. I’d been trying to act like nothing was wrong, but within my first hour there, Kara pulled me into a conference room.

“What’s going on with you and Kelly?” she asked.

“Who says my mood has anything to do with Kelly?” I asked.

“Kelly. She called me last night. She’s worried about you. You punched Sarah?” 

“During sparring. Not just out of nowhere. Not that I didn’t want to. Anyway, if I hadn’t gotten carried away, she wouldn’t have left.”

“You must have really hit her for Kelly to leave after you explained.”

“I didn’t.”

“What do you mean you didn’t?” she asked, chastising tone in full effect.

“Sarah is trying to break us up,” I partially explained.

“It’s working by the looks of it. So, why wouldn’t you tell Kelly that?”

“Lots of reasons. The main one being that Kelly needs her. I can’t take that away from her,” I elaborated.

“Kelly needs you, Alex. You’re giving up,” she said.

“You think this is easy? Telling her the truth about Sarah won’t make anything better.”

“Of course, it will. You’ll have her back!” she said, exasperated.

“And it’ll cost her the only link to her fiancée,” I shot back.

“Which sucks. A lot. But that is not on you. That’s on Sarah. And it’s only a matter of time before Kelly realizes the truth anyway. She’s going to need you. You have to be there for her.”

“I will be. But I can’t be the one to tell her. If she hasn’t seen it so far… She has to see it on her own. I’m in this situation because I let Sarah get to me and I didn’t hold back as much as I should have on that right hook. I know it might seem like I’ve given up, but that’s just because there’s nothing I can do right now. And I hate it, but anything I do could make things worse.”

“You’re a good person, Alex. Kelly knows that,” she said, offering an empathetic smile.

When she left the room, I stayed behind for a few moments, collecting myself. Part of me wanted to go home, but the emptiness scared me more than anything that could happen here. The rest of the week passed in much the same way and Sarah had probably found a job and a new apartment. One bedroom probably. We hadn’t spent more than a couple of nights apart since she’d moved in and her empty side of the bed was thoroughly depressing.

The feeling of wanting to tell her never quite faded, especially the longer I went without her. At least today, I had plenty to occupy my time. There were a few incidents throughout the day and when we returned from the latest mission, I showered and finally went home. It was after ten by the time I got there and when I opened the door, I was wholly unprepared to find Kelly sitting on the couch. I stopped breathing for long enough for me to realize I needed to inhale.

When she saw me, her body language changed and I could see the tension from across the dimly lit room. She stood, tentatively approaching me. There was a comfortable five feet between us and I spent a majority of this time trying to read her face. I had absolutely no idea what to expect. Being this close, now, I could see that her eyes were red and I decided to withhold my assumptions that Sarah had caused it because it could have just as easily been me. My stomach sank at the thought.

I was tense everywhere, especially when the words on the tip of her tongue stopped before becoming audible. She tried again, but shook her head instead and the distance between us quickly disappeared as her arms wrapped tightly around me. I was so surprised by it that I wasn’t even sure if it was okay to hug her back, but I did it anyway. I felt the warm wetness of her quiet tears soaking into my sleeve. I held her until she backed out of the embrace over a minute later.

“Can we talk?” she asked, wiping away the wetness from her cheeks.

“Yeah,” I said, sticking to a one-word answer so she wouldn’t hear the quiver.


	5. The Talk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thanks for sticking with me everyone! I hope you enjoy the final chapter. Their conversation must have been rewritten like six times. Haha. Anyway, please let me know what you think!

She sat down on the couch, slightly angled so that she was facing me when I sat next to her. I cleared my throat, mostly to fight against the tightness in it. The next sound in the room was Kelly inhaling deeply. Her cheeks puffed outward as she exhaled.

“I was upset that you lost control with Sarah. You’d never acted like that before. Seeing her face, and knowing that you did that to her… I’ll admit, it scared me a little.”

“I don’t want to be someone who scares you,” I replied, feeling the words more as a punch to the gut.

“You’re still scaring me, Alex. You haven’t even tried to talk to me since I left. I mean, you weren’t even going to try?” she said, voice shaking on the last couple of words.

A tear followed, rolling down her cheek quickly. I had given myself a million excuses to leave her alone and give her space and I had no idea how much it had hurt her.

“I wanted to, but I asked you not to go to her. You left anyway. You chose her over me,” I replied, giving her the only reason I really could right now.

“I didn’t choose anything. I was never supposed to leave the apartment. You were supposed to communicate with me. You could have told me that you were bothered by me spending time with her. We could have talked about it. You let me leave.”

“Because you still think this is all because I’m jealous.”

“That’s not true?” she asked, daring me to deny it.

“Of course, I’m jealous. Since we started dating, I’ve seen women look at you. Men, too. Some of them even try to talk to you when I’m sitting right there. It’s never bothered me. Not until her. Look me in the eye and tell me I have nothing to worry about,” I said, wishing she could.

She didn’t say anything and being on the other side of that silence really put into perspective how important it could be. I didn’t want to ask. I hated that the question even formed. The silence remained as I considered my word choice. The likelihood that something had happened was high. But it could have been anything from Sarah confessing her feelings to them having sex so I forced away the anger to prevent it from turning a question into an accusation.

“You left because you thought I was overreacting. You stayed away. Until now. So, does that mean you don’t think I’m overreacting anymore?” I asked, feeling like I was going to throw up.

“She kissed me. A few hours ago,” she admitted, releasing more tears and a deep exhale.

I got up from the couch, not able to look at Kelly right this second. My hands were on my hips as I walked a few steps toward the kitchen counter and turned back around. I needed to process and I just tried to be happy that they hadn’t slept together.

“Did you kiss her back?” I asked, when I calmed down.

“No. Seriously, Alex?”

She looked hurt that I’d asked. This was one of the hardest conversations I’d ever had to have. Especially, with this unfamiliar and frustratingly unwavering sense of insecurity. 

“You don’t have to hide parts of who you are around her. You have a lot more to lose if you lose her. Maybe she’s better for you,” I said, echoing Sarah’s words.

“Do you really believe that?” she asked, appearing completely caught off guard by my response.

She stood up and crossed her arms over her chest. 

“Kelly, I didn’t tell you all this because you need her. She can give you more than I can,” I answered, wanting her to at least understand why I did all the stupid things I did.

“Wow. You might have kicked her ass, but she really got into your head. The black eye makes more sense now.”

“I shouldn’t have done that. I just reacted because I couldn’t argue with anything she said. She’s known you a long time. There’s no way I can compete with that.”

I heard her inhale sharply after I said it and she walked the short space between us, gripping my shoulders. The firmness of it finally forced my eyes to hers.

“Listen to me. You are not competing with anyone. I love you. I don’t love her. What else can I say to make that clear to you?” she asked, exasperated.

There was silence for a second because it didn’t make sense. What she was giving up for me. Both of us were crying now and I took in a shaky breath just before she kissed me. I was surprised by it, but instantly reacted even though I couldn’t help the brief thought about how I was the second person to kiss her today. One of my arms wrapped completely around her waist, the other just above it. We were both breathing hard when we broke apart and I tried to check my arousal because it was currently in full force and one of her hands was already under my shirt.

She removed it now that there was enough space between us and once it hit the floor, she pulled me to her by the waistband of my jeans to resume the kiss. When she unbuttoned them, I felt a rush of cool air against the newly exposed area and any chance I had of calming down was out the window. The coolness, though, was replaced with a stifling heat when Kelly’s fingertips suddenly met the unbridled wetness. 

The kiss broke with a pop this time as soon as she felt it. She looked surprised, though she couldn’t have been. I’d spent the last week wondering if I’d ever see her again and suddenly here we were. I took advantage of the moment and dropped slowly to my knees, her hand falling back to her side. She looked down at me while I unbuttoned her pants and I saw goosebumps ripple across her abdomen at the sound of the zipper being pulled down.

I kissed her hips when I’d gotten her pants and underwear down a few inches. Her breathing grew faster with the increasing anticipation and I was already lightheaded from the scent that begged me to come closer. Her hips sent the same message, shifting forward almost imperceptibly. Once they were around her ankles, she kicked both away. My tongue flat, I traced her hip joint, stopping just at the top to bite her softly. When an impatient moan reached my ear, I readjusted, tongue slipping inside her as far as I could go at this angle.

Then, I followed the swollen lips upward, taking pleasure in the gasp when the tip of my tongue reached the most engorged part of her. My hands gripped the backs of her thighs to support her and I felt the muscles trembling beneath my palms. As much as I enjoyed the taste of her, I knew it was time to move this to the bed. When I got to my feet, I removed my remaining clothing before following her up the few steps to the bed.

As soon as I was back in front of her, I placed a thigh between her legs while taking off her shirt. Once it was off, she moved closer and I felt her wet warmth against my hip. It was so distracting that it took me much longer than usual to unhook her bra. She arched her back so I could slide it off with what little space was between us, only increasing the pressure my hip bone was applying to her. I pulled back the sheet on the bed with my right hand, still holding her to me with the other.

Kelly got into bed and when I climbed on top of her, I pulled the sheet over us, enveloping us in this important time of reconnecting. It was more intimate like this and it felt slightly strange to go from not seeing her for a week to seeing her like this. I could see that she was about to ask about the two seconds of hesitation so I stopped her lips with mine. Her rapid breath after sounded much clearer with nothing but pillows and crumpled sheets around us.

The soft warmth of her thighs on my hips exponentially increased my arousal. I pushed forward into her, wondering how long I could even last. I couldn’t kiss her anymore because I could barely breathe now, hearing her make these sounds. I kissed her neck when I could and one hand was permanently on her breast. I felt her touch me again and I wondered how she was able to even get her hand between us. I moved to my knees so that she could have more space to do what she wanted.

Her breath was hot on my chest but I only noticed the sensation for a second before she was inside me. I moaned in pleasure and surprise and my hips jerked forward, deepening the touch. Once I’d adjusted to the new angle, I continued my rhythm from before. She worked slowly and I could feel every inch of each thrust. I dropped my head the opposite shoulder of her engaged hand when I could no longer focus on holding my position. 

With my elbows already on the bed, I was able to easily work my arms under hers. Her skin was damp with sweat but there was no way either of us was going to stop to move the sheet now. I could feel my hair sticking to my face while I continued to chase her expert touch. My hips became unsteady during a particularly well-aimed thrust and I stopped moving completely as all of my muscles tightened around her. My forehead pressed harder into her shoulder when the rest of my body contracted.

Her moan broke through the haze and I knew it had to do with how intensely I held her inside of myself. When I was able to pick myself up again, her hand rested on my hip and I felt how wet her fingers were despite the sweat. I was still weak a minute later, but I fought through it because I wanted Kelly to feel this, too. I kissed her neck, shoulder, and chest, enjoying the salty taste. I cupped her between her legs with my right hand, noticing her readiness immediately.

Before I entered her, though, she rolled me onto my back, tangling the sheet around her right leg when she sat astride my hips. When she bent down to kiss me, I held her gently against my body. At this angle, her legs were spread wide and the sensitivity between my own quickly subsided after the first few back and forths of her hips. I moved my grip lower to aid in her rhythm. It was slower than I’d expected and I wondered if it was because she was already close.

Each languid drag was intentional from start to finish and I was always in awe at how alive my whole body felt. Even when she was on top, her body was so submissive to me. I held her tighter so that I could add pressure with my own upward movements. With each push, I felt her control falter that much more. I felt the pillow move under my head as her right hand fisted in it. I sped up because she was right on the edge. After only a few seconds of the new tempo, she stilled above me. 

I kept moving to intensify the orgasm that was now radiating through her. Her cheek was against mine and her multiple moans, right in my ear, gave me all the encouragement I needed to carry her the rest of the way through this. When she relaxed on top of me, I felt her shiver as the fan cooled her skin. Her cheeks were very much still flushed, though, and she moved to rest on her side after a minute, her breasts pressed into my shoulder. I stayed on my back, but turned my head to face her.

“I missed you so much, Alex. You have no idea,” she said, placing her hand in the middle of my chest.

“I have some idea,” I replied.

“I never meant to hide any of myself from you,” she said, her uncovered nudity backing her statement.

“I know.”

“I won’t anymore. If you’re still okay with it, maybe we can talk about her sometimes,” she said.

She sounded nervous at the suggestion, but that was all I wanted to begin with. I wanted her to have someone to talk to. If that was me, all the better.

“Whenever you want,” I said, leaning over to kiss her just so she’d know for sure.

**Author's Note:**

> By the way, if anyone knows how I get in on this Dansen Thirst Squad, let me know. I like the prompts they come up with and would love to try some!


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